The Spy Who Loved Me

With apologies to James Bond, Ian Fleming, and, well, just about everybody else. Here is a grab from my mail bag.  The message was subject-lined: GPS Spy Applications.

“I recently suspected my wife of cheating, having been involved with gps as a land surveyor since 1995, I used and application called mobile-spy.

“In order to install the application onto an iPhone you have to “jailbreak” the phone. Once its installed it will forward all text, url’s, and a gps location every 30 minutes if it has satellite availability. To make a long story short, I caught my wife in a pretty precarious spot, or spots. It’s my opinion that she was sneaking out and meeting someone at various spots on our normal routes, little hidden offroad trails if you know what I mean. Well I tested and retested the phones gps and the data from the mobile-spy website where I purchased the software, which is actually sold under the name “retina-x” and they make there money by giving you access to these logs through mobile-spy.com.

“However, my wife contests that all this data is wrong, of course, and she’s never been anywhere near these places. On the other hand, I have a ton of evidence saying she WAS at these locations. She says she’s read an article on AT&T that shows evidence that the gps in the iPhone is faulty and gives out bogus locations. As I said, I tested this a couple of times and it seemed to work perfectly.

“In good faith we’ve agreed to let me take the iPhone and perform more in depth tracking over a span of a few weeks. I am not really a writer but I’ll definitely keep detailed logs of my observations. Have you guys already had this particular issue come up before? If so, I’d love to know anything you can tell me because the way it stands I am getting a divorce unless this application can be proven wrong! My email is xxxxxxxxxxx@yahoo.com
Cell phone is XXX.XXX-XXXX, I don’t check voicemails, so if I don’t answer just send me a text with your name and number. I look forward to hearing from you soon.”

Sleep was what I wanted, you know what I got.  Wide awake, staying up late, wishing I was not.